The Sexuality Lure, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Brain

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and males use love to obtain sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where songs translate good sex as love. However those who fall under the Sex Trap go even further due to the fact that for these singles, making love brings tremendous significance and repercussions.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two ways:

A.they believe sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will be great also).

B.more typically, all awareness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as soon as they make love.
So, rather than taking a look at whether this other individual may be a match on levels besides physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with truth when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are attracted to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases sexual desire), makings the chance to make love with someone we are brought in to very hard to resist. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel very close to and bonded official statement with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are uncontrolled and strong , leading to powerful sensations of attraction, enjoyment, wellness, love, and closeness .

However when issues occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently justify by believing, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is terrific!" They more than likely wouldn't confess, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to click this the rest as optional. Their main scouting tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mostly with gay men, states that many of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men specifically in cities, sex is easily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North says. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical look, encourages sexual activity. If a possible partner is going to be sexually suitable, lots of gay guys want to discover out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be excellent?".

However, North adds, "I suspect this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do desire to point out that chemistry is essential. Chemistry is a provided that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it must be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry occur, though sometimes it can grow gradually.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication disappears and truth hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormones) with your head. This means combining chemistry with good sense. While great sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying full attention to your vision, goals, requirements, and worths -- while feeling all those exciting triggers!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Comments on “The Sexuality Lure, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Brain”

Leave a Reply

Gravatar